Archive for the ‘russian’ tag
Grab Your Economy By The Balls
So, my few but loyal readers have all stopped checking this blog by now, I’m sure, after the 2 months that have gone by without a single new post. “Earth Day” or something. Scroll down.
Man, I love it when people are scared to spend money, because it effects The Economy. When economic uncertainty abounds, people get scared, it’s interesting all the creative things The Economy inspires. Here are a few scenarios:
“Why aren’t we going to Disneyland this year, daddy?” “The Economy told me Mickey Mouse called for you. Yeah, he said GO TO HELL, junior.”
“Are we only going to eat Ramen noodles, fish sauce, and meatless Hamburger Helper? We want to eat tasty bacon-wrapped fillets?” “The Economy ate your ‘effing fillet. Now eat this banana peel for dessert and shut up.”
“Why can’t I go to college?” “Because The Economy said there was a two-for-one sale at Kia, and if you traded one of your children in for slave labor in North Korea, you get double value on your trade in. Now get into the crate, sweetie.”
“Why are you home at every day, staring at your bulging biceps and shaving once a week?” , “The Economy whispered to my boss during a private jerk-off session on a warm summer evening that I should be freed from serfdom the next day.”
It’s like a full moon or something. I say to hell with that. Grab The Economy by the balls.
Anyway, my regular news feeds are stocking 1000+ articles about Protests, so in the interest of saving time, I’m skipping to recent and for now I’m just going to throw in a few fun tidbits for you to nibble on:
Ah, GreenPeace are always up for a good protest, and it appears as though “tourism” is going to be a victim of Climate Change. Hanging banners and all. One of the worst things that could happen when the planet warms up is that people will not have the desire to go see ANYTHING anymore.
According to this article, the Russians are shouting for work. To our Russian friends: In America, people don’t beg for work. Nobody’s trying to work hard over here. What people in the United States want is cold hard cash! That’s capitalism, baby.
The EU appears to be much more Right now. So, we’ll see how things turn out, but my real theory is that big gust of retardation left the United States when Bush left office and blew right over to European soil.
Speaking of our favorite Ex-prez, I have a mental visual of George W. Bush sitting in a recliner facing the window with a bratwurst and a six pack, watching his haters and his supporters duke it out in his front lawn.
Until next time…
